Besa Gordon

Besa Gordon

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Back 2 Besa EP3 - Surviving R Kelly and Why The Women Stayed

If there was ever a time that I was actually happy an artist doesn’t own the masters to their music it would be now! And shout out to the hotel manager that took Dominic’s mom up there. He knew what was up!

When I first started watching Surviving R Kelly, I didn’t think it would make me reflect on my own life and things I’ve dealt with. But it did!

We meet Jovante Cunningham, one of the many victims who fell for R. Kelly’s Pied Piper charm. When she said “He destroyed a lot of people. I can’t stress to you enough how people are still suffering behind things that went on 20 years ago.” I just knew this documentary would be more than just interesting. I don’t know about you, but it was a bit emotionally draining, and I needed a glass a wine after watching it.

Jovante Cunningham brings up a time when she caught Aaliyah and R. Kelly having sex on the tour bus, which left me looking like *insert shocked meme*

Don’t get me wrong, I remember hearing the rumors of R. Kelly dating Aaliyah, and even marrying her, but back then I didn’t have cable, so I never seen the interview where they wore matching clothes. Plus in 1994 I was only 5-years-old so even if I did watch the interview it wouldn’t have mattered.

One thing I found interesting while watching Surviving R Kelly was the amount of parents that would trust R. Kelly with their young daughters knowing good and well he likes to have little girl sleep overs. It’s almost as if because they wanted their daughters to be the next Aaliyah it was worth the risk. I just don’t understand why you would bring a child around knowing he has a sex tape out of him peeing on a 14-year-old. Yes, the man in the video is “allegedly” R. Kelly and it wasn’t proven to be him in court. However… Why would you even take the chance with that kind of news about him floating around?

Aside from being discussed after realizing the meaning behind songs like “Bump n’ Grind” people were confused about why these women would stay, or even worse. Leave and come back. People have to understand, controlling people like that is something that was done over time. They could have left, but the mind control was embedded so deep that they wouldn’t leave. And mentally they couldn’t leave. Aside from him possibly threatening to hurt their families, at some point when you’re brainwashed you don’t know what you’ll do without your “mate” or whatever you want to call the person.

These women weren’t tied to a bed nor did they have trackers in their skin somewhere. It was all mental control. Which is way more powerful than simply chaining someone to a chair. When you’re brainwashed, you don’t know life without that person. Life doesn’t even make sense without that person. Even though the things you may have gone through are things no one ever should live. It doesn’t matter, your common sense says run. But your heart... well that piece of shit will be the first to remind you of how things started. And we all know that will keep you there every time until you’ve truly had enough.

This documentary opened so many old wounds from my past life, that I’ll talk about one day but not today. However I will say I pray the families continue to reach out and try to get to their children even if they are of age. Because even after they leave, tust me. Those girls, well now women, will never be the same.

And lastly, if you’re reading this and you’re in an outta body situation like shown in this documentary, know that it won’t be easy to leave. Hell, even packing your bag and jumping on the plane won’t be easy. BUT if you can get the strength to get up, and get out. Don’t look back. Just go! You’ll thank yourself letter. Trust me!

What did you think of the documentary? Check out my recap of the show on my Back 2 Besa podcast!

#SurvivingRKelly #MuteRKelly                       

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